At the Movies

It's a rare occasion that I go to the movies.

I like my home set-up, can talk at the screen, hit pause, not listen to strangers munch their popcorn, whatever. I pretty much save a theater trip for something that I really want to see big and loud. Star Trek, for example, is a perfect theater choice for me. But there are enough Star Trek reviews for all, and I'm only going to add to its praise, so what I'll write about instead was my theater experience.

The theater itself was pretty normal: ticket takers, popcorn makers, lines at the (women's) restroom. Early to the theater, we had the row to ourselves for a few minutes. Then our neighbors sat down. All was fine, until his first raucous, no holds barred, I just downed a Diet Coke with a beer chaser, BELCH. I wish I was exaggerating.

It wasn't the last of its kind, either. And the sarcastic comments flowed just as freely throughout the evening. I couldn't resist--I had to look over once. You understand, right? My eyes beheld not an unruly teenager (as, I admit, I was expecting) but a grown man on either side of 40. Kind of blew my mind.

In case you're wondering, he did bring a date. And she seemed to find him charming. See? There is someone out there for us all.